Why You Should Not Upset Your Elf

As much as you might resent having to remember every night to move your elf.

As tempting as it is to talk trash about your elf with friends.

As delicious it would taste to chuck that thing in the bin while enjoying a nice glass of chianti.

Please be careful not to piss it off too much.

Elf on the Shelf The Godfather on ElfShaming by Kim Bongiorno

These things are serious when it comes to sending a message.

Heck, it doesn’t even matter who did the pissing-off. Elves aren’t above using their own kind to make a point.

Elf on the Shelf The Godfather Horse Head Scene on ElfShaming by Kim Bongiorno

Trust me: this is not something you want to wake up to.

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Let Me Take an #Elfie Video Because of Course

Seems some elves just can’t stay away from their camera apps these days.

(NOT THAT I’M COMPLAINING.)

And now it seems they even have their own theme song!

Which obviously means they have their own music video.

Obviously.

Check it out:

From the creators of the video: Inspired by the Elf on the Shelf parenting craze, #ELFIE is a parody video of the Chainsmoker’s hit #SELFIE prepared to take social media by storm this holiday season. While on duty, #ELFIE is the family-friendly model of good behavior that Santa would hope for in a helper, but once the children drift off into dreamland, he parties like it’s December 26th. From visits to Las Vegas to photos with celebrity friends, he has the kind of fun you’ll have to see to believe.

Facebook: Christmas Elfie
Twitter: @theselfieelfie
Instagram: @theselfieelfie

Enjoy humming this tune for the rest of the day! YOU’RE WELCOME.

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The Kind of Shining You ABSOLUTELY Do Not Want on Your Tree

It’s a good thing we’re getting some time off for the holidays, because all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

And by that I mean OMG LOOK OUT HE HAS AN AXE!

Elf on the Shelf The Shining on ElfShaming by Kim Bongiorno

The funny thing is that this doesn’t look too scary if you haven’t seen the movie. But if you have seen it? I’m truly sorry for making you piddle your pants and fear your upcoming hotel stay.

Then again, maybe playtime isn’t always as fun as it could be?

The Shining Twins on ElfShaming

Have any other favorite scenes from The Shining? Send them my way. I love them all in the “I will never sleep again” sort of way.

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Peeping Elf

Here’s the thing about elves: they look like innocent felty folk who just want to steal candy canes and bags of mini marshmallows for adorable games of holiday hockey with passing chickadees and chipmunks.

I mean, yeah, of course they love doing that. Who wouldn’t?

But there are other things they love to do.

Other more…sordid things.

And if they can’t do them?

They watch.

Peeping Elf by MomComs on ElfShaming

Another glorious daytime date ruined by a peeping elf.

The pervs.

The irony here is that this elf’s name is Diamond Snowfake. You’d think with a moniker like that he’d be a wee bit more original and classy than this, BUT NO.

(Am I the only one glad we can’t see what he’s doing with his hands?)

Elf photo submitted by Jennifer Scharf of MomComs. Follow her on Twitter.

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‘Twas the Night of Thanksgiving: The Elf Poem

There is a reason all that tryptophan from the Thanksgiving turkey doesn’t make us parents quite as drowsy as everyone else in the house.

We know what’s about to go down. And it is glorious.



Twas the Night of Thanksgiving 2014 ElfShaming  Elf on the Shelf

Ready to start playing with your elves? We’d love to feature them here on ElfShaming! Here’s how to submit your photos.

Need some inspiration? Here are 106 Elf on the Shelf Ideas to get you started.

Need an elf? Try some of these elves and elf alternatives:*

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*This is an affiliate link. If you order something from it, I will earn a small percentage. Thank you for supporting ElfShaming!

106 Elf on the Shelf Ideas

From a little silly to downright naughty, here are 106 Elf on the Shelf idea prompts to get your creative juices flowing. Whether your Elf on the Shelf is pulling a prank on your kids or you want to share some adults-only antics with your friends, there’s something here for everyone. Have fun!



106 Elf on the Shelf Ideas by ElfShaming

  1. Playing board games
  2. Playing card games
  3. Playing reindeer games
  4. Playing with knives
  5. Playing hard to get
  6. Hanging out
  7. Hanging up
  8. Leaving notes
  9. Leaving poop
  10. Leaving a mess
  11. Leaving Santa
  12. Cute
  13. Kissy
  14. Kinky
  15. Sneaky
  16. Sexy
  17. Sewing
  18. Singing
  19. Inappropriate use of marshmallows
  20. Inappropriate use of scissors
  21. Inappropriate use of markers
  22. Inappropriate use of tape
  23. Inappropriate use of a gingerbread house
  24. Inappropriate use of a candy cane
  25. Inappropriate use of Christmas lights
  26. Inappropriate use of cleavage
  27. Inappropriate use of a smartphone
  28. Running
  29. Rowing
  30. Looking
  31. Listening
  32. Thinking
  33. Throwing
  34. Up high
  35. Down low
  36. Should he be drinking that?
  37. Should he be eating that?
  38. Should he be reading that?
  39. Should she be watching that?
  40. Should she be buying that?
  41. The big 7: lust, envy, gluttony, greed, pride, sloth, wrath
  42. Lies
  43. Confessions
  44. Persuasion
  45. Excuses
  46. Blackmail
  47. Bribes
  48. Revenge
  49. Regrets
  50. Road trip
  51. Sexual relations with himself
  52. Sexual relations that are logistically tricky
  53. Sexual relations with multiple partners
  54. Exhausted
  55. Obsessed
  56. Forgetful
  57. Stealing food
  58. Stealing jewelry
  59. Stealing hearts
  60. Poor life choices
  61. Retelling an urban legend
  62. Retelling a children’s book
  63. Retelling the story of your favorite TV characters
  64. Retelling the story of his rap sheet
  65. Retelling the story of his sordid past
  66. Retelling favorite song lyrics
  67. His relationship with the dog
  68. His relationship with the internet
  69. His relationship with the kids in the house
  70. The truth behind the smile
  71. The truth about her last Girls Night Out
  72. The truth about how she interacts with the toys of the house
  73. What he cooks
  74. What she cleans
  75. What he bakes
  76. What she hides
  77. What he reads
  78. What she writes
  79. How she spent her time at the store
  80. How he spent his time in the attic
  81. How she spent her last dollar
  82. How he spent his Spring Break
  83. How she got away with murder
  84. How she ruined the party
  85. How she got an injury
  86. How she spends her days
  87. How she spends her nights
  88. In the kitchen
  89. In the bedroom
  90. In the bathroom
  91. In the basement
  92. In the living room
  93. In the closet
  94. In the yard
  95. Getting creative with chocolate
  96. Getting creative with stickers
  97. Getting creative with cotton
  98. Getting creative with frosting
  99. Getting creative with chalk
  100. Getting creative with cameras
  101. Getting creative with LEGO
  102. Getting creative with zip lines
  103. Favorite outfit
  104. Favorite craft
  105. Favorite prank
  106. Favorite hiding spot

Ready to start playing with your elves? We’d love to feature them here on ElfShaming. Here’s how to submit your photos

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We Are Ready for Your Naughty Elves

Do you want your elf to be featured on ElfShaming?

We’re already accepting pictures of elves (and elf-alternatives like Hanukkah Helpers, Mensch on a Bench, Maccabee on the Mantle, trolls, gnomes, squirrel statues in festive hats, homemade elves, and the like) being naughty! We’ll take antics from G-rated silliness to R-rated shenanigans. Anything goes in this neck of the North Pole!

Check out how easy it is to submit a photo of your elf’s antics.

ElfShaming wants to feature your naughty elves!

Want a real challenge? This year’s special series (in addition to the regular photos) is “ElfShaming Hollywood.” We’ll be recreating some of our favorite movie scenes (not just holiday movies–ANY movie) because we are slightly insane. Want in? Simply email ElfShaming@Gmail.com with the movie and scene you’l like to do, and we’ll add you to the calendar.

Need some inspiration? Here are some fan favorites:

You can also read our list of 106 Elf on the Shelf Ideas.

Need an elf or the like for your shelf? Order one here:*

We look forward to seeing what your little spies are up to this year!

Make sure to follow along on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and my weekly newsletter so you don’t miss a thing!

*This is an affiliate link. If you order something from it I will earn a small percentage.

Win an Elf on the Shelf from @ElfShaming

Edited to add: GIVEAWAY IS OVER

Come win your very own Elf on the Shelf from ElfShaming! Enter below for your chance to win 1 of 3 elves we’re giving away just in time for the Thanksgiving kick-off.



Three winners will receive an Elf on the Shelf just in time for Thanksgiving 2014!

It’s time to prepare for the most magically elf-rific time of the year with one of the following:

Elf on the Shelf boxed gift set with boy elf and book.
Elf on the Shelf boxed gift set with boy elf and book.
Plush girl Elf on the Shelf in a white skirt.
Plush girl Elf on the Shelf in a white skirt.
Plush boy elf.
Plush boy elf.

This giveaway is open to residents of the Continental US only, and ends 11/17/14. Good luck! a Rafflecopter giveawayLike this? Follow ElfShaming on Facebook and Twitter For all the ElfShaming posts and more of what Kim Bongiorno writes, <ahref=”http://letmestartbysayingblog.us6.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=0bdb1837fc59ec04704dd0d46&id=87704fb031″ target=”_blank”>subscribe to her Sunday newsletter.

Mistletoe Takes Revenge

Anne thought it would be nice to start a new tradition with her two young boys, so she decided to introduce an Elf into the holiday season.

Being that she loves all things vintage – and it is, in fact, her job to find beautiful old things with charm and style – she went with an old school wooden ornament Elf.

How quaint!

Mistletoe the Elf delighted her children, and left notes for them each day. She was even a little lenient on the “no touching the Elf” rule when her boys wanted to take Mistletoe on a short joy ride around the kitchen on one of their toy trucks.

The following day, Mistletoe’s note mentioned that he enjoyed his ride on the truck. Next thing you know, BOOM.

Mistletoe the Elf leaves a note on ElfShaming

One of her sons takes Mistletoe on another joy ride, and it doesn’t end well at all.

REENACTMENT:

Mistletoe Loses an Arm on ElfShaming

Anne jumped right in, rigging a sling for Mistletoe’s now-amputated arm until the boys went to school. Then she fixed him as quickly as she could with hot glue and a prayer.

Mistletoe the Elf on ElfShaming via SplendidJunk

This time, Mistletoe’s note had a P.S. on the back of it, requesting the play time be slightly less dangerous.

But that wasn’t enough. Oh, no.

Mistletoe waited until the family was fast asleep, slipped into Anne’s very special cabinet full of delicate vintage items she had carefully curated from estate sales and cleaned up into near-perfect condition, and with his newly refurbished arm BUSTED. IT. UP. YO.

Mistletoe Takes Revenge on ElfShaming

I guess it’s true what they say: revenge is a dish best served…broken.

Today’s Elf is from Anne of Splendid Junk Vintage
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Want to submit an Elf? Email ElfShaming@Gmail.com.

7 Deadly Elf Sins: Lust

The 6yo gave Sporticus the Elf a cute teeny teddy bear.

Sure, it was a bribe because she had behaved in a way that she knew Santa wouldn’t quite approve of. But – other than that – it was an innocent enough gift.

The innocence didn’t last long.

Not long at all.

ElfShaming 7 Deadly Elf Sins Lust

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Want to submit an elf of your own? 

Photograph your elf doing any of the 7 Sins and post it directly to the ElfShaming Facebook Page. The favorites will be featured right here on ElfShaming.