Many elves misbehaved last year.
(Many, MANY elves.)
Lots of you hoped your naughty elves learned their lessons, and gave them a second chance to make better decisions this time around.
Her elf Gertie had an innocent face she whole-heartedly trusted when her family received her as a gift in 2012, and yet she turned out to be an illicit seductress. Amy punished her accordingly, and put her back in her box in the attic for the next 11 months.
Gertie the Elf vowed this year would be different, so Amy let her back out.
Seeing the mass of ingredients strewn about the kitchen for a feast, Gertie even volunteered to help make Thanksgiving dinner with her capable, fingerless hands.
But the moment her gaze lit upon that pasty white foul, It. Was. Over. She could not resist sliding herself inside the biggest body cavity she’d ever dreamed of.
And yes, it’s true: She brought her own pound of butter to ease her way in…
And back in…
And out again…
Amy could do nothing but hang her head in shame, then send me in the evidence of Gertie the Elf’s excitement.
It just goes to show, not every elf deserves a second chance.
Bad, bad Gertie! Off to Free Clinic you go…
Elf submitted by Amy Kalasunas.
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